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Friday, May 7, 2010

Reservation is Monkey Business

Reservation is Monkey Business:

I am a Sudra and I want to explain to my brothers belonging to SC, ST, OBC, Dalit or what ever oppressed class they belong to, what Reservation is all about and why it will never help you all the way it is supposed to.

My mother always tried to explain, complex life scenarios through simple stories , stories that got embedded in my memory for a life time..

This Monkey business story is very relevant as applied to current Reservation saga..

Their were five hungry dogs looking for food on the streets. One kind lady who was feeding her children felt sorry for the dogs and threw one full chapathi at the dogs.. It was her wish that they all share the chapathi.

Dogs being dogs, stood around the chapathi growling at each other making claims. Not one dared to get the chapathi as it would be out numbered 4:1.. So it was a stalemate five hungry dogs fighting over just one chapathi..

Watching all this fun was a Smart Monkey sitting on the branch of a tree . The monkey says look fellows, "look, I can help you share this chapathi equally if you trust me". The dogs did not trust their own kind to resolve the dispute but were unanimous to agree to the monkeys suggestion.

So the monkey comes down picks up the chapathi and climbs back on to the branch..

He then counts the number of dogs and says, "wish you were six dogs and not five as dividing the chapathi into five equal pieces is very difficult.." the monkey explains

The dogs agreed that the chapathi be split into six equal pieces so the monkey could have one share..

The monkey broke the chapathi and said since you have been so kind, let me eat my share first and the dogs agreed..So the monkey ate the first piece..

Then the monkey showed the remaining five pieces to the dogs one by one.. They were not at all happy as the were not equal sizes and argued who would eat the big piece.. Lot of howling and growling yet there was no decision..

So the wise monkey said since none of you are happy, I will take the smallest piece and break off all the big pieces and make them smaller.. The dogs thought that this was a brilliant idea too. Wished they were just as clever as the monkey.

The monkey started his monkey business eating bits of the bigger pieces making all pieces smaller and smaller.. Then suddenly the monkey says "excuse me fellows, I have to go as there are other monkeys on this tree now and they are smarter than me and I will ask them to solve the distribution . He leaves the little crumbs on the branch and takes off. All that the dogs could do was bark their heads off and they all went hungry and angry The lady who threw them the chapathi was disappointed with the dogs for their stupidity..

Cast or Caste in order of Importance :
Kind Lady - Mother India, Chapathi - Opportunity, Monkey - Arjun Singhs Congress
Breaking up chapathi - Reservation, Dog-1- Uppercaste Hindus - Brahmans
Dog -2- Forward Castes Hindus, Dog-3 - OBC Other Backward class, Dog-4 - Scheduled Caste
Dog-5 - Scheduled Tribes

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